5.31.2007

Update on what's happenin:

* In Houston at the moment. Actually hanging out at my old place of employ - Christ UMC. Good to see some friendly faces and see how everyones doing...
* Been playing this game on facebook - iLike - its a music quiz. Fun times.
* Committed to lead worship officially at two churches in Dallas. That is fun, and a cool way for me to help earn some money while not exerting too much time.

What I'm readin:

* Still on GG&S ... still love it.

Random thoughts on my PVM:

Coming back to Sugar Land has jogged my memory a little bit. It is good seeing friends and feeling at home in a church building, but it also reminded me of why I left this church. The sharp divergence between my own personal experience and the words that I found myself speaking to the youth and members of the church was beginning to tear at me. Perhaps if we are sensitive to the tug and struggle of 'real life' and to the brokenness of the human soul, we would find a way to allow leadership in the church to truly exist within the Via Media. It seems that we are always asked in church leadership roles to slide away from the middle; maybe we think this will help drag others over towards the middle from their 'wanderings.'
I don't know the answers. But I do know that every time I felt like I had to hide a part of my own personal struggles when speaking to those who were struggling themselves, I was participating in injustice. I was perverting the truth, and manipulating the emotions of young people who could one day, be standing exactly where I was.
Maybe down the road I will begin to try and share my experiences and wisdom with young people again; but for now, I will focus on sharpening my senses, and listening harder to the echoes of G-d's music in this dark world.

4 comments:

michael said...

as the first to comment on your blog, i must say that i would like to know more. i just finished my first week of leading worship at wesley, and please pray for me that i don't get burned out and that i keep my priorities straight. i can't seem to put my guitar down. my friends here are all at least 4 years older than me, ryan, eric, callum, and adam, so i am the kid around here. my lab job is not too bad, and o-chem won't kill me. me and danielle are looking for a bible study to do together, do you have any suggestions, we were thinking about song of solomon. and finally, i can't wait till the next song of ice and fire book comes out. none of the books i've read recently have been any good.
take care

Ragamuffinag said...

Mr. Guff.

Well, sweet first comment! I must admit, it was first rate. Second, I was just talking to J Busch, and he noted that people still say "sandwiches" in the pause after "make a joyful noise to the Lord, all the earth." Your legacy continues.

Regarding your comments on burnout, my only recommendation is this: don't do it for anything or anyone but G-d. That means several things... 1- when you lead worship, you won't care if you make mistakes or not, because G-d desires sincere worship first and foremost; 2- when people don't sing or sing artificially, it won't burn you down, because you are trusting that G-d will do what G-d will do, regardless of how it looks on the outside; and 3- you can only get better at expressing the worship that comes from the inside.

So what that translates to is that if you seek after G-d, day in and day out, your worship (and hence, worship leading) will be inside out, rather than vice versa. I led worship for many years outside-in. That meant that I would use the worship experience to help me seek G-d. That's one way to burn out, because it becomes your tool for seeking G-d, rather than expression of fear, wonder and hope to the living G-d.

So hope you read this. =) Let me know your thoughts.

michael said...

While reading your comment, one word lingers in my mind...trust. I guess I got to thinking that I've been charged with the job of inspiring people to praise God. I've spent too much time thinking about which songs sound the best and not enough time in prayer. You're right in that He will do what He will do. I'll try to worship inside out. anywho, did you ever make a sound on that ram's horn?
just popped into my head.
thanks

Nate Custer said...

Hey Man,

A new blog ... I did not realize it for a little while. Nice posts, especially this one. The honesty and prophetic tone in it is great (remember prophecy starts with: "I am a man of unclean lips, from a people of unclean lips").

I am looking forward to being outside of "youth ministry" so I can speak of my own struggles freely again.

You are awesome dude, see ya next week.

Nate